"I stay in love with love."

"It cuts so deep
It hurts down to my soul
My friends tell me
I ain't the same no more
We still need each other
When we stumble and fall
How we gonna act
Like what we had
Ain't nothin' at all now" - I stay in love with you by MIMI

"You should respect my inside."

When I thought none of my friends could have a family that is extremely dysfunctional, I was sorely mistaken. Conversation in the diner and my friend said, "I kissed her mother." I made a suggestion that perhaps he would be better suited with his "girlfriend's" mother than with his "girlfriend". He calls this girl that he spends time with his "girlfriend" so I can't say if that's true. He quickly agreed with my earlier statement but then stated about the "girlfriend's" mother, "but if we spend time it has to be dark, completely dark, too much renovation." Yes, guys can always reach new levels of low.

"Last night, she said"

Last night, I was accompanied by three male friends because basically I'm a kick ass guy masked in a sexy Asian woman's face and body. We went to this club that has 15 dollars cover and all the drugs imaginable available to you. My friend called it "Burning Man" but every month. At one point, I was waiting on line for the bathroom and due to my lack of patience spotted a guy with what I thought was a cigarette and asked if I could have one. It was not a cigarette but a cool vintage style pipe filled with weed. The guy offered me the pipe and I passed it to the couple behind me before returning it back to the guy. We got so high or at least I got so high that when it came to our turn to use the bathroom, we opened the "bathroom door" and saw two other things that should never be used for urinating. A huge sink and a washer. With all three of us ready to go (only to pee), I used the toilet, the girl used the sink and the guy used the washer. This is what was heard after, "I'm gonna rinse this sink a little, I'm gonna close this washer, wait for me I'm still peeing!" When I have these nights which I think I don't have very often, this song always comes to mind,

"Last night, she said:
"Oh, baby, I feel so down.
Oh it turns me off,
When I feel left out"

So I walked out:
"Oh, baby, don't care no more
I know this for sure,
I'm walkin' out that door"

Well, I've been in town for just about fifteen minutes now
And Baby, I feel so down
And I don't know why
I keep walkin' for miles

See, people they don't understand
No, girlfriends, they can't understand
Your Grandsons, they won't understand
On top of this, I ain't ever gonna understand...

Last night, she said:
"Oh, baby, don't feel so down.
Oh, it turns me off,
When I feel left out"

So I, I turn 'round:
"Oh, baby, gonna be alright"
It was a great big lie
'Cause I left that night, yeah

Oh, people they don't understand
No, girlfriends, they won't understand
Your grandsons, they won't understand
And me, I ain't ever gonna understand...

Last night, she said:
"Oh, baby, I feel so down.
See, it turns me off,
When I feel left out"

So I, I turn 'round:
"Oh, little girl, I don't care no more.
I know this for sure,
I'm walking out that door," yeah

Judge me not for who I am but for what I do.

My psychiatrist whom I will be referring to as Mr. Black called me today. Another affirmation about how well I was handling the strife that is Public Assistance. It's only temporary like all else that has come and gone in my life. This will be the first fully welcomed goodbye of temporary I will probably have.

only me?

I was treated to lunch by a homeless guy yesterday. Absurd? Perhaps. But there I was sitting across from this man in the middle of a fast food restaurant. After he announced, "you've got a 7 dollar expense account", I ordered 5 dollars worth of food.